--- title: "#10: The Real Reason Suffering Exists - Dr. John Demartini" description: Dr. John Demartini is a polymath, human behavior expert, and internationally published author. image: https://blog.kevinwathey.com/hubfs/KW%20-%20ALL/io%20-%20Podcast/io%20Pod%20%20%20%20Blog%20Featured%20Image.png --- [Skip to the main content.](https://blog.kevinwathey.com/io/10#main-content) [![Kevin Wathey Signature](https://blog.kevinwathey.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Kevin%20Wathey%20-%20Signature%20%5BTransparent%5D%20(No%20SubTitle).png?width=588&height=164&name=Kevin%20Wathey%20-%20Signature%20%5BTransparent%5D%20(No%20SubTitle).png "Kevin Wathey Signature")](http://www.kevinwathey.com) [![Kevin Wathey Signature](https://blog.kevinwathey.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Kevin%20Wathey%20-%20Signature%20%5BTransparent%5D%20(No%20SubTitle).png?width=588&height=164&name=Kevin%20Wathey%20-%20Signature%20%5BTransparent%5D%20(No%20SubTitle).png "Kevin Wathey Signature")](http://www.kevinwathey.com) - [Newsletter](http://www.kevinwathey.com/newsletter) - [Podcast](http://www.kevinwathey.com/podcast) Toggle Menu Toggle Menu - [Newsletter](http://www.kevinwathey.com/newsletter) - [Podcast](http://www.kevinwathey.com/podcast) ###### **Do THE verb, don't be the noun** — Inputs Only. [Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/kevinwathey) [Linkedin](https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevinwathey/) [X](https://twitter.com/kevin_wathey) [YouTube](https://youtube.com/c/kevinwathey) 1 min read # #10: The Real Reason Suffering Exists - Dr. John Demartini [Kevin Wathey](https://blog.kevinwathey.com/io/author/kevin-wathey) : April 12, 2024 [Inputs Only Podcast](https://blog.kevinwathey.com/io/tag/inputs-only-podcast) [![Watch On YouTube](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/21176166/ea60ab23-e2e0-49f5-aa9d-37cb0677b1d3.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/21176166/ea60ab23-e2e0-49f5-aa9d-37cb0677b1d3) ![Featured Image](https://blog.kevinwathey.com/hubfs/KW%20-%20ALL/io%20-%20Podcast/io%20Pod%20%20%20%20Blog%20Featured%20Image.png) Be it the loss of a loved one, a relationship, or otherwise... grief is something we've all dealt with. My guest today not only explains why no grief should last longer than 3 hours but he takes us through his grief deconstruction process, too. Dr. John Demartini is a polymath, human behavior expert, and internationally published author. In this episode, expect to learn why grief is a fallacy, how your life revolves around your innermost dominant thought, how your values are formed and what they say about you… and more. Including my personal favorite, why we often fall back into previously conquered patterns.   - Time Stamps [00:00](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=0s) Why Grief Shouldn't Last Longer Than 3 Hours [04:49](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=289s) Understanding The Role Grief Plays In Life [09:26](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=566s) Challenging and Changing Social Conditioning [14:15](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=855s) Why We Experience Grief and Suffering [15:04](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=904s) How To Find Transformation in Loss [38:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=2301s) Why Your Voids Lead To Your Values [58:02](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=3482s) Uncovering Unconscious Motives [01:10:19](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=4219s) Navigating the Murky Waters of Morality [01:16:38](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=4598s) Living With a Mission and a Vision [01:24:57](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78DDpRnrE88&t=5097s) Life Lessons on Love and Wisdom - Ep. Sponsors: Leisure Project | Hydration Made Happier Available on Amazon: [https://amzn.to/49Lj3We](https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbG05bkxiU0tYNms4NE5xWTF3aTJEV2JUaUdiQXxBQ3Jtc0trNGthcGI2Y1lZZTRXekJXN3NoLU1yMzAzd0E1UEVEbHcyeFo4SGY5a3hXQ1FaWW1BcVc1OFZTdDM4OW5aM3JVRTMtVHVERUNUQ0I3MVdBSWV3SXVlU0t0cm5HdjNfVWpyNEpraER5TFJPV1pVMS1WZw&q=https%3A%2F%2Famzn.to%2F49Lj3We&v=5uyev0hKMe8) Receive a discount at checkout using code: INPUTSONLY10 - Get in touch in the comments at: YouTube: [Click Here](https://www.youtube.com/kevinwathey?sub_confirmation=1) Instagram: [Click Here](https://www.instagram.com/kevinwathey/) Twitter / X: [Click Here](https://x.com/Kevin_Wathey) Follow Me: [https://beacons.ai/kevinwathey](https://beacons.ai/kevinwathey)   #### Inputs Only – Newsletter A weekly email of learnings for life & work. - [Terms](http://www.kevinwathey.com/en/terms) - [Privacy](http://www.kevinwathey.com/en/privacy) - [About](http://www.kevinwathey.com/about) - [Contact](http://www.kevinwathey.com/contact) © 2026 Wathey & Co., Inc. 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