A few weeks ago I wrote about Self-Sabotage, and how I was first introduced to the Tony Robbins world during a team offsite. On day 3 of that event, my first Tony event, I chose to sign up for his Platinum Partnership.
Platinum Partnership is a year long mentorship that includes 12 events with the 'big man' himself and education from some of the biggest names in the world. Most people in that community view the Partnership as a status symbol, partly due to its high costs ($120k annually), yet I viewed it as an opportunity to get in the room with those I aspired to learn from.
Less than 30 days after enrolling at the 15,000 person Unleash The Power Within, his introductory event, I was back in Florida. Only this time for a 'Plat' only 500 person Date With Destiny in Tony's private studio. I went all in, played full out, and drank the Kool-Aid... and it was worth it. I learned more about myself during that event than I had in the previous five years, but I also recognize the work I had done leading up to that event prepared me for the event.
During my time in that world I noticed three distinct types of people.
1. The people who are only there to chase significance.
2. The people who are there because of an addiction to breakthroughs (often the same one year after year).
3. The people who are there to learn. To take what serves them and leave the rest (and there's a lot of 'rest').
It was fairly apparent who belonged each community, and I did a phenomenal job of distancing myself from those in the second category... the first is apparent, but as long as you don't adopt their beliefs, you can learn a lot from them.
The Goal - Learn, observe, and adopt (the good).
Pro Tip - You can learn something from everyone, and everyone can learn something from you. You always belong.
Returning from the DWD, I felt high... which is their primary means of retention. There are moments they lead you to believe that you cannot access that state without these events - but belief is a poor substitute for experience ;). I remember speaking to my father when I returned, explaining what had taken place and how much money it cost me to attend and his jaw hit the floor.
His first question to me was more of a statement, "You better make that back in new business."
New business was never my intention because I firmly believe you don't get in life what you want, you get in life who you are... and if I'm continually investing in myself and elevating who I am it is physically impossible for life not to move me towards who I'm meant to become.
Two months later I had become interested in Infinite Banking, and if you know me, you know I become obsessed. In the week leading up to our next event, Financial Mastery, I read seven books on the topic and was telling everyone I knew about the concept. At the event I shared with other Plats what I had learned, educating them on how they could do it for themselves, too... and one asked me if I knew Andre.
Turns out, Andre owns a Financial Services company, among others, and was in the audience that day. At the break I asked my friend to point him out and I walked up to him and said, "Hi, I'm Kevin. I think we're supposed to meet."
We spoke for five to ten minutes, I explained what I did, what I was interested in, and the books I had read... then the event started back up. At the next break I went back up to him thinking we were going to pick up the conversation where it left off. Instead, he started grilling me on the concept (I believe doubting I read all those books.)
I passed with flying colors, because I had read all the books, and he asked me where I lived (Scottsdale at the time). After a few back and forth exchanges in disbelief, it turns out his office was across the street from my apartment. He asked when I was leaving the event, I said Monday, and he said I should fly back with his team. I said I would try and change my flight to his, asking his flight number and what time it left... his response "When we get there."
Kevin's Foot - 1
Kevin's Mouth - 0
I showed up to the private airstrip in West Palm Beach, greeted his team, and he apologized that his jet was being repaired. Because of this, he had borrowed Robert Kiyosaki's Learjet. We boarded and off to Scottsdale, AZ we went... and I with a new book recommendation - Rich Dad, Poor Dad.
For the better part of a year he continually tried to get me to join one of his preexisting companies, but it was always doing something I wasn't passionate about, so I held back, and I'm glad I did. Nevertheless, we had an occasional dinner in Scottsdale and I stopped by the office time and again. I remember asking once why he had involved me in internal affairs not being part of his company, and his response stuck with me.
He said "It's because you always ask the most insightful questions in response."
I'll never forget that.
It was almost a year before we did any business together, and now we are building three. A wellbeing retreat center in Costa Rica (Azul Resort & Retreat), a diagnostic company (MODWellness.com), and an app that tracks healthspan.
Focus on creating the person you want to become... the rest will sort itself.
Here are 5 things I've learned to date observing him, and others, do business.
1: Never Say 'Yes' On The Phone
If you're a recovering people pleaser, like myself, you often say yes because that's your habitual response.
In a recent interview, Shane Parrish explained the number one thing he learned from Psychologist and Economist Daniel Kahneman... and that is his rule in which he never says yes on the phone.
Let's break this down.
He references the word 'rule' because it's a construct that's societally acceptable... so you wont be questioned.
He uses said rule to create a state in which he is in complete control.
He doesn't instinctually say yes to something six months out that he would have said yes to tomorrow.
There are a lot of lessons in the systemized process to living... and I can think of a few more I'd like to implement.
I'd love to learn what systems you've implemented to keep you in your desired state, too.
2: Never Be The First To Send A Proposal
I once believed if you're the first to make a move that you have the upper hand...
... when in actuality, this move only weakens you hand overall.
When you take a breath and allow the other party to show their cards you are able to take into account their point of view, as well as your own, and create an even stronger position giving you know exactly what they desire in the deal.
Another way to state this lesson is to move with intention.
3: Never Assume Mutual Interest... Even With Friends
This lesson is often learned in response to a negative experience... but it doesn't always have to be that way.
Contracts are often viewed as scary 'legal-jargon,' but the truth of the matter is that they protect both parties.
*At least when they're structured properly.
In a recent deal we did, it took us over three months to finalize an initial LOI (letter of intent).
This felt like an absurd amount of time to be, seeing as I like to move fast and solve problems, but what it actually did was allow us to start the working relationship on an incredible strong and mutually beneficial footing.
4: Your Only Limitation Is Your Own Imagination
I've learned this lesson from many points of view over the last few years, both to my benefit and to my detriment.
What is interesting is my own imagination works to solve problems with what is known to me, and his works to solve problem with what is known to him. Meaning - I revert to technology, because that's what I know... and he often reverts to an older, more relational way of doing business.
Neither is right nor wrong, but what is fascinating is that both approaches are able to solve the problem.
The challenge is not allowing your 'track record bias' to create a limitation and steer you away from an easier solution.
5: Unless It's In Writing, It Doesn't Exist
During the acquisition of our first retreat center, there were numerous unexpected findings during the due diligence period... many of which we took someone's word for. Which is not wrong, but certainly not definitive.
What we eventually found out was that their, and our, assumptions were wrong... and what took three months to complete could have taken less than three weeks should we have asked for clarity on the root cause of the problem.
When in doubt, go to the source... no matter how trustworthy you believe someone's opinion to be.
Quote On My Mind:
"With clarity of vision, strategies and tactics become self evident."
While stillness may feel counterproductive to success.
Moving in the wrong direction will always be worse.
If you lack a clear vision, focus inward until it appears.
Time Management Hack:
I'm getting real good at viewing things through the lens of systemization... let me give you an example.
I am moving into a new home on the 30th (because I wanted a yard for contract and a standalone office) and I found the perfect spot in Los Angeles. I obviously want friends to be able to come do contrast with me, out of state friends to be able to come visit me and stay in my guest room, and to host events for my local community.
Instead of doing everything manually, I created a website (for my home) in which the above can be booked.
It's pretty epic if I do say so myself.
Obviously I'm not sharing the link publicly, but if you know me personally and want to come over for contrast, book the guest room, or stay in the know about upcoming events - shoot me an email or text and I'll send it over.
In Case You Missed It
In last weeks edition, I wrote about the lessons from my first 100 mile ultramarathon:
- Pain exposes everything.
- You are not your mind.
- Perception is not potential.
- Farther together.
To become the person you want to be, you must do what that person does...
... often before you're ready - so start today!
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